Number 7 Cancer Surgery Looms

"3rd annual" surgery for the reoccurrence of vulvar cancer. I was very freaked out. The dread of submitting to another anesthetic, another bit of tissue cut away from my body, another recovery, with another surgical alteration of my body to learn to live with, seemed too much for one person handle. Was this lucky #7, the end?

From my lips, this bitter cup pass - a statement that came to mind during one of my mostly sleepless nights.

A long 12 days later, after that #7 surgery; in late August/2002, Dr. Miller informed me of the results of the pathology report. Another surgery was required as soon as possible - number 8 - mid-September if she could book the appointments. Here was the dread, spoken aloud. The surgeries, the cutting away of always another part of me; this course of action just didn't seem to be addressing the cause.

We negotiated; she agreed to delay until mid-October. The question I had to ask again, "Is this life threatening?" Her answer "Not in a month or two, but potentially in six months, definitely in a year or two. The longer it's left, the more serious it can get."

And there it was. The dread spoken aloud.

She carried on, telling me about the procedure and the plastic surgery that with the assistance of a plastic surgeon would be necessary this time. That she planned to remove all the suspect tissue with good margins; this would open the side of the vagina into the abdominal cavity and would require a flap of skin grafting to close. Further, that she would arrange an appointment with a plastic surgeon to examine me and formulate a surgical approach.

And there it was. The subject of primary importance for my inner being to ponder.

I do believe that everything happens for a reason. The universal spirit, God if you will, has all the answers; it's up to us to be open to receive the message. So began the process of sifting through the avalanche of advice from well-wishers, the unending parade of products, consulting with a variety of health practitioners and my own research.

Although there is a tremendous amount of statistical information available on the internet, personal experience stories are elusive. Then I found "Anne's Vulvar Cancer Center" and her story, specifically about her horrific experience with vulvar cancer surgery. Consequences, irreversible surgical consequences stared me in the face.

After living September to the fullest; grasping at every pleasure, awakened to every experience, talking to as many family and friends as I could reach and traveling home to Alberta for a huge wedding/reunion and a most decadently luxurious cruise to Alaska; I began the task of decided what's next.

While in Alberta, Renee arranged a consultation with a master herbalist. The time with Jean was very reassuring; he identified symptoms and concerns that were mainly subconscious until then. I leave his office armed with the recommended Chinese medicines.

From the very deck of the cruise ship straight into discussions with the totally dedicated and focused health conscious friend, Charles Holmes from Conscious Planet; total immersion into an in-depth, no holds barred discussion on a radical life choice/change. A most generous outpouring of practical how-to, what to eat, how important it is to detoxify and what products to use from a handful of companies: Conscious Planet, Avena Originals and of course the Colloidal Silver Water Kit. Tons of positive re-enforcement then delivered to the ferry back home with a 2 month supply of hemp protein, oil and seed products from Conscious Planet and a request for a testimonial on the results. There followed a most intense very long family evening of discussions on alternatives, choices, examining options, surgery or no surgery and the consequences of each. Ken, my fortress, put forth the suggestion that we could begin: continue to detoxify, eating only live raw foods; deleting all sugar, dairy, wheat, caffeine or processed foods; take all the nutritional products as recommended, still explore all the consequences and delay making a decision on the surgery for a couple of weeks. So, upon waking the morning of September 26, it just was Day 1 of our new lifestyle. We did the weigh in, the measurements; that was a bit of a shock. We had somehow not been aware of those exact statistics. And so it began, eating only raw. Nothing cooked or processed. No caffeine, no dairy, no sugar, no wheat. Live food to live, dead food to die. Very easy to make choices when the factors are reduced to the basics.

Avena Originals   Colloidal Silver Water Kit

Consulting with the two career nurses in my inner family circle helped me formulate a list of questions to ask my doctors. Getting through the inherent barriers of our medical system to get appointments in the schedules of these two foremost specialists; "just to ask my questions" was itself an experience in empowerment.

My list of questions:

How long will the surgery take?
How much of which areas will be removed?
What is involved in skin grafting?
How is it attached?
Where is the skin harvested?
How big is that area?
How is the healing from the harvest site?
Are there any drugs necessary? (Anti-rejection, pain, antibiotics?)
How long is the hospital stay?
What is required for wound care?
Will there be a catheter? For how long?
What is the follow-up?
Is home care nursing recommended?
What do we do if something goes wrong?
Is our local hospital (3/4 of an hour away) capable of handling complications if necessary?
How long is recovery?
Is there any concern about permanent bladder control?
Will there be scarring that would hamper movement and/or walking?

These two wonderful compassionate women, who have earned the right to claim to be the foremost in their fields; made time in their very tight schedules for me and answered every question to the best of their abilities. Again, it's like the chicken and the pig discussing a breakfast of bacon and eggs. The chicken contributes, the pig is totally committed. They're the chickens, I'm the pig. The routine becomes the weigh-in every morning, documenting changes, preparing smoothies and a fruit salad for breakfast, veggies the balance of the day. The pleasant surprise that we aren't feeling hungry, this new eating style isn't causing any distress. We are adjusting to radically changed eating habits that turn away from most of the food of our culture. Attending to business, daily choices at meetings, food and coffee of course, offered everywhere. Becoming more confirmed in our new reality. A wonderful reading resource is what we have come to call 'THE BOOK' - After The Doctors What Can You Do? By Ron Garner, which is now out of print but still available through Amazon.com. While learning about the events of our toxic diet on colon health and autointoxification I remember the Health Harmony Healing Centre. I return to colonics twice a week. The nutrition and colon health consulting is part of the treatment package. These so compassionate and caring women want to help and share their wisdom. And they are very careful not to influence my decision in any way, they only share information. A bonus! The weight starts peeling off, a pound at a time. We start feeling encouraged. We feel better. Walks become an anticipated adventure of the day with new venues to explore. Results: Day 4 - I am starting to sleep, the regular 4 to 5 hours a night becomes 8 to 9 hours. Day 5 - There's a hormonal balancing taking place; the hot flashes are GONE!

"After the doctors. What can you do?"   Health Harmony Healing Centre

Decision Day!

October 15:

Calling to say "Cancel me off the surgery list."

October 16:

Another trip to see Dr. Miller. She has an incredible piece of equipment that allows me to see what she sees and does on a TV monitor. I again get to see parts of my anatomy that nature never intended me to see. She shows me the cancerous lesion tissue, its position, its size, shape, color, outlines the area that would have been surgically removed and grafted. She takes a biopsy and asks permission to take digital pictures. A kudo to her; despite my decision not to proceed with her recommended treatment plan; she will continue to monitor my process and document the results. We have been partners in my survival since 1996.

October 17:

It's done.

This is my path - Eat live to live. No to the food of our industrialized culture; no to everything packaged, processed, preserved, canned, bottled, fried or cooked.

My colonics appointment at the Health Harmony Healing Centre is filled with congratulations on my decision. Now they can share their relief at my decision.

I am amazed at the wisdom of presenting information while withholding opinion. Here's another valuable lesson for me.

Tomorrow is our 33rd anniversary.

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